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[personal profile] amelia_petkova
I'm not going to post to [livejournal.com profile] au_bingo or AO3 until I have my card as finished as it's going to get, but I'll post the fics here as they go along so you don't get dumped with them all at once.

Title: Home Sweet Home

AU Bingo Square: Other: Castaways
Fandom: The Princess Bride
Word Length: approx. 820
Summary: Westley and Buttercup don’t leave the Fire Swamp
Disclaimer: I don't own The Princess Bride and its characters.


Westley and Buttercup came to the end of the Fire Swamp. At this time the forest was still quiet around them and they could not hear the hoof beats of Prince Humperdinck and his entourage.

“He’s certain to catch up with us,” Buttercup said. “Going around the Fire Swamp will take a while but he’ll do it.”

“You must have charmed him while I was away, to make him want you back so badly.”

She frowned. “I think it’s more a point of pride. Humperdinck would never accept an unsuccessful hunt.”

Slowly, very slowly, Westley’s face brightened. “Would you say that the Prince is a reckless man?”

“Not exactly. Other people view him as reckless but he always plans his hunts carefully.”

“But he wouldn’t go to idiotic lengths to find the quarry—in this case, you?”

“He might, depending on how desperate the situation is. The wedding is an important celebration, after all. Why do you ask?”

A full smile now appeared on Westley’s face. “Reckless enough to take on the Fire Swamp?”

It took Buttercup a moment to catch on to his meaning—understandable, since it had been a long and stressful day not even including catching on fire, nearly drowning in sand, and being attacked by giant rodents—but when she did understand, she couldn’t believe him.

“Live in the Fire Swamp? You can’t be serious.”

“Do you have a better idea? These bites are starting to hurt and I can’t think of any better ideas.”

She gave in. “Very well, the Fire Swamp. For how long, do you think?”

“You know Humperdinck better than I; how long is he likely to keep looking?”

“Forever.” Buttercup sighed in exasperation at the troublesome Prince Humperdinck. “Or until he thinks we died, or something else catches his attention.”

“We may be able to arrange a ruse along those lines later. But I think we shouldn’t waste any more time.” Indeed, a moment later they heard the approach of many horses.

Buttercup and Westley plunged back into the Fire Swamp. “What of your ship? Will they wait for us or leave?” she asked.

“I’ll find a way to send a message later.” Despite the wounds and exhaustion, he smiled. “Now that we’re together, I was going to find a new Dread Pirate Roberts, anyway. I may try contact that Spaniard; at the very least, his fencing is good enough for the position.”

They were constantly on edge for the first few days: every moment, they expected to hear Prince Humperdinck’s footsteps. The Fire Swamp could be lived in but learning how to do so was not the easiest process. Still, they survived. After a month they decided that Humperdinck believed they must have died in the Swamp: the place contained any number of things that could a person and although he might have risked the dangers if he had known the quarry was alive, there was no reason to believe Buttercup and Westley had survived.

They built a cottage in one of the clearings and chopped down some of the branches above it to let in light. The Lightning Sand was easy enough to avoid if you watched your step. The flame spurts were more troublesome but Westley eventually marked all their locations and they came in handy for cooking. The ROUS’s rarely troubled the couple after those first encounters; perhaps the creatures had just enough intelligence to realize that a sword with long reach and opposable thumbs were superior to sharp teeth. On the rare occasions that an ROUS did approach, Westley killed it and they cooked it. Once the diner stopped thinking about what the meal had been, the meat was quite good.

Westley managed to communicate with his ship without alerting Prince Humperdinck and told the crew not to expect him back. He also passed on word that he had seen a six-fingered man. They replied that they had indeed been in contact with one Inigo Montoya, who had been persuaded to take up the career of the Dread Pirate Roberts after they hunted down Count Rugen. On the whole the crew was satisfied with his performance, though it had been difficult to break him of shouting, “Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya!” at each target. Fezzik had accompanied him however, and the giant’s good nature made up for his friend’s flaws. Indeed, the crew’s vocabulary improved as a result of rhyming with Fezzik.

Westley and Buttercup built a life for themselves in the Fire Swamp. It was not an easy place to live in but it could be done, and they had each other. And if it was not the exact happy ending they had always dreamed of, who was to know?

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